Private Last Dance

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There are several songs the FI and consider "our song", so we had a very hard time deciding on one for our first dance. We decided we wanted to take dance lessons, so we wanted to choose a song early so we have time to take lessons and get plenty of practice. So while browsing the internet I came across a few lovely shots like the one above, that caught my eye.

What happens is, when all of the guests leave to get ready for your grand exit (or when they all leave if you are not doing one), you and your new husband dance together alone. Its just the two of you, the DJ and the photorapher. Or you could even have the DJ start the song and then step out. So not only do you get another intimate moment with your new husband, but you can also get some great photos!

This seems like a great solution to our first dance song problem since we can pick two songs to dance to. Plus we dont have to eliminate any songs that are difficult to dance to since for the private last dance we can just sway if we want. We plan on limiting it to about 3 minutes, which will give the guests enough time to prepare for our grand exit. Plus I love the idea of having a few moments to basks in the last few minutes of our wedding together.

Did you do this at you wedding or have you ever heard of it?

First Look - Why we plan to see each other BEFORE the ceremony

First Look | 9.18.10, originally uploaded by ltbeyer.

I had not heard of a first look until I started wedding planning (by wedding planning I mean stalking wedding websites as soon as I knew he was looking at rings). I think they are the best thing since sliced bread!

Traditionally, its considered bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the wedding. This dates back to the time of arranged marriages and the concern that if the groom saw the bride and she was not attractive, he would cancel the wedding. Mr. Modern already knows what he is stuck with, so this is a non issue for us. But tradition is tradition, and many brides want to see that look on the grooms face when he first see's her walking down the aisle.

That was really important to me, until I actually saw photos and videos of real first looks. Not only do you still get that moment, you can share it in private with your love. You can laugh, cry, kiss, whatever you want. And the biggest benefit is that you can take most or all of your photos before the ceremony and actually be able to attend your coctail hour.

There are a variety of ways to do this, but the most common I have seen is the groom standing somewhere and the bride walking up behind him. He turns around....and the laughter or tears (or both) begin. You can have the parents or bridal party present or it can be just the two of you, the photograper and videographer. If you are having videographer, I highly suggest you have them present for this so you can view this special moment over and over again.

So why have we decided to do this? The main reason is that we want to be able to act on our emotions when we see each other. I want Mr. Modern to tell me how beautiful I look, and i want to be able to hug and kiss him and enjoy the moment. I also love the idea of being able to take the photos early. We can take the time we need to get the pictures we want without having to worry about rushing to get back to our guest, we can get picutres in daylight since our wedding will be in the eveneing and we get to attend out cocktial hour.

And for those those who are concerned about ruining the walk down the aisle, dont be. Every bride and groom that I've heard from who had a first look said the walk down the aisle was just as emotional and just as special as they had imagined it would be. Seeing each other before did not take away the moment. In fact, this is actually the norm in Jewish ceremonies.

So what do you think? Are First Looks a great idea?